911 Is A Joke

The story you are about to hear is true. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent and the stupid...

After the pizza-drug deal it seems her dumb-ness lay dormant. We were relieved and thought the worst was over. Oh how we were wrong.
This summer, summer of 2013, we began to experience blackouts in the neighborhood. It seemed natural to me since the temperature reached 110 and everyone had their air conditioning on and thats a lot of drain on the power company. The first time we had one everything went out. Street lights, traffic lights...everything. (REDACTED), the land lady grabbed her cell phone and called 911.
911.
The Emergency hotline for police, fire and ambulance.
I can't even begin to fathom how that conversation went.
"911, whats your emergency?"
"The power is out."
"Um...say again."
"The power went out on the block."
"911 is only for emergencies."
"This is an emergency. Our power is out."
"Please call your power company not 911."

This conversation dragged on for a few more minutes. In that time people with real emergencies like dying, house on fire or wearing a LA Clippers jersey couldn't get the help they needed. Now if the story stopped there you'd think I just told you a funny story about how messed up my land lady is. However the story doesn't end there...it get worst.

On our property is two houses. One house for the men the other house for the women. Now a group of women had moved into the house and decided that their first act of being in Los Angeles was to go to Universal Studios. Since no one had a car they decided to take the city's fine public transportation. You may not no it but i was being sarcastic. Public Transit here runs on a 'we'll get there when we get there' attitude. However I digress, the landlady decided she wanted to go with them. To get to Universal from here you catch a bus to the train and the train takes you to Universal. So they catch a bus and arrive at the train station. At the train station one of the roommates, we'll call her Pam, had a seizure.
How did the land lady respond?
She decided to bring Pam home.
At home Pam decided to have another seizure. The land lady calls....the housing company's front office. She talks to her boss, we'll call her Marsha. (REDACTED) calls Marsha and asks her to call 911 for Pam.
Marsha asks why (REDACTED) doesn't call 911. (REDACTED) tells Marsha that whomever calls 911 is responsible for the medical bills and she doesn't have that kind of money. Go back and read that sentence, I'll wait. Read it again. Let the words sink into your soul. Eventually an ambulance was called and Pam got the help she needed.
At this point I was furious with (REDACTED) and the main office. This woman was insane. If I was home alone and needed help and she was my only hope...I would die. At this point I put myself on a aspirin regiment because if I ever had a heart attack that would be a wrap. I was mad at the front office because they now know that she is incompetent and had anything happened to Pam her family could have sued. This woman is responsible for my well being and she is as dumb as a box of rocks.

Unfortunately this was the start of the spiral into unconditional stupidity.

Coming up next "Ode to Murphy's Wood Oil"