Today I thought I was going to have a relaxing day. The roommates decided to go to the beach leaving me home alone. They would come back at 5PM and then we'd grill. Perfect time for me to get some writing done on the feature and two TV shows that I am working on. However stupidity doesn't rest...ever.
At 4PM the land lady came into the house with her collection of cleaning supplies. It took her three times to bring in all the chemicals that she was using to clean the bathroom. Luckily the discussion I had with her about bleach and ammonia yielded results. However she still managed to come in with several bottles of stuff with high chemically smells including her new cleaner of choice: Pine-sol. I text the roommates and let them know what is going on. Translation: Stay at the beach because the house will not be in any condition to cook or eat in.
At 6PM she completed the bathroom. Two hours later. Mind you it's not a big bathroom. It's a small apartment bathroom. Then she moved to the living room...where I am set up with notepads and laptop...where I am writing...also I am watching a Walking Dead marathon. Fortunately she decides to clean the dining room first. She wipes off the tables and then pours a soap called Fabuloso on the floor. She swirls her mop around a few times and them moves into the kitchen.
At 7PM she begins the kitchen. It is at this time I notice the air conditioning not working. I bet it's because the kitchen door is open. I walk into the kitchen and sure enough the kitchen door is open. I close the door and get back to my writing and Walking Dead. She comes back into the house. I hear the door open but not close. I go into the kitchen and the door is wide open. Again I close the door. Again she opens it and leaves it open. I close it again. In the back of my mind I can hear my grandmother yelling "Close the door, we ain't cooling off the whole neighborhood." She leaves the door open once more. At this point I am at the edge of my wits.
I beckon her to the door and begin explaining how our air conditioning works. "Our air con is set on auto, that means that the house will try to keep itself at 75 degrees. When you leave the door open the outside hot air rushes into the house and warms the house. This causes the air con to work harder and if we do this often it will cause the air con to burn out." I said this as if talking to a child. The only response is "Ok."
She continues to busy herself in the kitchen. I glance over to see her cleaning the refrigerator. Now when I say cleaning the refrigerator you'd probably think she was pulling out all the food and wiping down the shelves. Wrong. Nope. She wiped the parts of the shelves that didn't have anything on it. In a refrigerator shared by eight people this left her with two small spots to wipe.
It is now 8PM. I can't have my 4th of July steak because the house smells of chemicals....and now she is beginning to sweep the living room.....FML.
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